Some Straight Talk About Your Success And Happiness

I want to warn you: this article can cause some discomfort, indignation and sense of insult in minds of people who are not ready to be successful. If you are not ready to face the truth, please don't read this article, because I don't want to hurt your feelings for nothing.

If you've decided to keep reading answer a couple of questions first.

How old are you? What have you done in all these years that you can be proud of? What have you done to become successful and happy person? And now let me ask you just one last question - WHY aren't you successful and happy yet?

In my long practice with people I've heard so many different answers that if I'd decide to write them all down I could publish a 500 page book. I'd call it "The guide for people who want to be miserable and stay that way forever".

Think about it... Who is responsible for you not being happy and successful?

Not your neighbors, not your wife, not the circumstances, not the economy or the weather. YOU ARE.

It is YOUR life, YOUR choices and YOUR responsibility. I know it is very hard to accept, because we are so used to blame everyone and everything for our unhappiness and our failures. We don't want to take responsibility for our actions. Furthermore, we're afraid of the responsibility because if something goes wrong we will have no one to blame for it, but ourselves. This includes the level of your achievements, the quality of your relationships with other people, the state of your physical health, your debts or your lack of self discipline.

When you refuse to accept responsibility for the situation, you lose control over it. You will feel depressed and frustrated because you can't change the circumstances, you can't change the economy and you can't change other people, you can only change yourself.

That change will give you great benefits. Instead of a life victim, you will become a successful, self-confident person. You will make life what you want it to be. Responsibility for the actions and self-esteem is the only small but crucial difference between a dismal failure and an impressive success. It doesn't take long to go from failure to success. All it takes is an attitude adjustment.

You can start making small changes in your life right this moment. Don't wait any longer, because until you don't do something about your life, nothing is ever going to change.

For example, if you had a fight with someone, say "I'm sorry I overreacted. I shouldn't have yelled at you". Don't say "You said this or did that. You made me lose my temper!" If you are late for work, say "I'm sorry, I overslept. I'll make sure it won't happen again". Don't say "My alarm clock didn't ring" or "Traffic was really bad".

If you screw up, admit it. Take the responsibility for your actions instead of saying "Mistakes were made".

Learn from your mistakes. Analyze what kind of changes you can make right now to achieve your goals in future. Important thing is to constantly move forward. Don't wait for the opportunity to appear at your door step or the planets align the right way. Create your own opportunities.

Copyright 2005 Arina Nikitina

Arina Nikitina is the owner of http://www.RecipesForYourSuccess.com website where she shares proven tips and techniques on how to lead happy and fulfilling life you deserve. Visit: http://www.recipesforyoursuccess.com

In The News:

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President-elect Barack Obama speaks about the economy at George Mason University in Fairfax, Va.,  Thursday, Jan. 8, 2009. (AP Photo/Charles Dharapak)AP - President-elect Barack Obama urged Congress Thursday to work with him "day and night, on weekends if necessary" to approve the largest taxpayer-funded stimulus ever, warning in almost apocalyptic terms that a dire economic future was certain without it.



Senate Budget Committee Chairman Sen. Kent Conrad, D-N.D., right, accompanied by House Budget Committee Chairman Rep John Spratt, D-S.C., left, takes part in a news conference on Capitol Hill in Washington,  Wednesday, Jan. 7, 2009. (AP Photo/Charles Dharapak)AP - President-elect Barack Obama's proposed tax cuts ran into opposition Thursday from senators in his own party who said they wouldn't do much to stimulate the economy or create jobs.



Fire and smoke is seen from Israeli miltary operations in Gaza City, Thursday, Jan. 8, 2009. Lebanese militants fired at least three rockets into northern Israel early Thursday, ripping through a crowded nursing home and threatening to open a new front for the Jewish state as it pushed forward with a bloody offensive in the Gaza Strip that has killed nearly 700 people. (AP Photo/Abdel Kareem Hana)AP - The U.N. and the Red Cross curtailed aid shipments in the Gaza Strip on Thursday after accusing Israeli forces of firing on their drivers, killing one. The threat of a wider conflict arose when militants in Lebanon fired two rockets into northern Israel.



Pedestrians walk past Generations Menswear on 8th Ave. in New York Wednesday, Jan. 7, 2009. Retailers are reporting dismal sales for December, confirming fears that the holiday season was the weakest in four decades.  (AP Photo/Craig Ruttle)AP - Retailers reported dismal sales figures for December on Thursday as even Wal-Mart Stores Inc., one of the bright spots in the industry, finally buckled under the pressures of the deteriorating economy.



President-elect Barack Obama makes remarks on the nations economy, Thursday, Jan. 8, 2009, at George Mason University in Fairfax, Va. (AP Photo/Lawrence Jackson)AP - Barack Obama is officially the next president of the United States, Congress declared Thursday in fulfilling its centuries-old constitutional duty to certify and tally the electoral college vote from each state.



AP - President-elect Barack Obama is urging Congress to postpone the Feb. 17 switch from analog to digital television broadcasting, arguing that too many Americans who rely on analog TV sets to pick up over-the-air channels won't be ready.

In this Jan. 5, 2009 file photo, disgraced financier Bernard Madoff leaves U.S. District Court in Manhattan after a bail hearing in New York. A defense lawyer for Bernard Madoff is expected to submit written arguments Wednesday to a judge who is probing whether the disgraced Wall Street financier should be jailed before trial. (AP Photo/Kathy Willens, File)AP - Prosecutors said Thursday that investigators found 100 signed checks worth $173 million in Bernard Madoff's office desk that he was ready to send out to his closest family and friends at the time of his arrest last month.



AP - Researchers at Cornell University have discovered that Aedes aegypti mosquitoes — the ones that spread diseases like yellow and dengue fever — alter their wing vibrations in a mating signal.

A florist delivery worker carries a wreath of flowers at the entrance to Jumbolair Aviation Estates, where actor John Travolta and his family have a home Wednesday, Jan. 7, 2009  near Ocala, Fla. Friends and relatives are expected for a ceremony Thursday to be held for the death of the Travolta's sixteen year old son Jett, who died while in the Bahamas. (AP Photo/Phil Sandlin)AP - John Travolta and his family were expected to host a private memorial service Thursday for their son, 16-year-old Jett Travolta, at their home in a central Florida gated community.



This Sept. 7, 2007 file photo shows Atlanta Braves pitcher John Smoltz tipping his hat to fans as he leaves the game after giving up a hit to Washington Nationals' Ronnie Belliard, ending Smoltz's bid for a no-hitter, during the eighth inning of a baseball game at Turner Field in Atlanta. Smoltz has reached a preliminary agreement on a contract with the Boston Red Sox, a stunning end to his long career with the Atlanta Braves. The deal was expected to be finalized later Thursday Jan. 8, 2009. (AP Photo/Gregory Smith, File)AP - After more than two decades with the Braves, John Smoltz appears likely to finish his stellar career wearing a different uniform. In a stunning end to one of baseball's longest runs, Smoltz reached preliminary agreement on a contract with the Boston Red Sox after failing to work out a deal to return for his 22nd season with the Braves.



President-elect Barack Obama at a news conference in Chicago, December 7, 2008. (Jeff Haynes/Reuters)Reuters - President-elect Barack Obama warned on Thursday that the U.S. economy could stay mired in recession for years without bold action and he urged lawmakers to work day and night to pass a massive stimulus plan.



Israeli soldiers take their positions during Israel's offensive in the Gaza Strip January 8, 2009, in this picture released by Israel's Defence Forces (IDF). (Doron Keren/IDF/Handout/Reuters)Reuters - Palestinians faced even grimmer conditions in the Gaza Strip on Thursday after a U.N. aid agency halted work, saying its staff were at risk from Israeli forces fighting Hamas militants, after two drivers were killed.



A customer shops at a Wal-Mart Supercenter in Rogers, Arkansas, June 5, 2008. (Jessica Rinaldi/Reuters)Reuters - Wal-Mart Stores Inc and other top U.S. retailers delivered disappointing December same-store sales and profit warnings on Thursday, sparking fresh recession concerns that hit stock and currency markets.



Bernard Madoff is escorted from Federal Court in New York January 5, 2009. (Lucas Jackson/Reuters)Reuters - A search of accused swindler Bernard Madoff's office desk revealed he had signed checks totaling more than $173 million ready to be sent, U.S. prosecutors said in court papers on Thursday asking a judge to jail him.



A device that distributes gas from the underground reserves is seen at the natural gas storage facility of Turkish Petroleum Corporation in Kinali, some 100 km (62 miles) west of Istanbul, January 7, 2009. (Osman Orsal/Reuters)Reuters - Russia said on Thursday it would restore gas supplies to Europe through Ukraine once international monitors were in place, but Moscow and Kiev remained at odds over the terms of any supervision.



People walk past the Bank of England in central London, January 8, 2009. (Rob Bodman/Reuters)Reuters - Economic weakness in Europe worsened and disappointing sales from Wal-Mart, the world's largest retailer, knocked financial markets lower on Thursday, strengthening the case for government stimulus and new rate cuts.



Reuters - A criminal probe into the CIA's destruction of videotapes showing harsh interrogations of terrorism suspects is almost finished, court papers made public this week show.

A man looks at a large screen displaying India's benchmark share index on the facade of the Bombay Stock Exchange building in Mumbai, January 7, 2009. (Punit Paranjpe/Reuters)Reuters - India's Satyam Computer faces a crisis of "unimaginable proportions," its interim chief executive said a day after the chairman revealed profits had been falsely inflated for years.



Palestinian protestors throw stones at Israeli soldiers following a demonstration in the West Bank village of Bilin. The main UN Palestinian relief agency halted work in Gaza on Thursday after a driver was killed and the death toll from Israel's war on Hamas rose to more than 760 after dozens of bodies were found in the rubble.(AFP/Abbas Momani)AFP - The main UN Palestinian relief agency halted work in Gaza on Thursday after a driver was killed and the death toll from Israel's war on Hamas rose to more than 760 after dozens of bodies were found in the rubble.



A man warms himself near a stove in a bar in the town of Belovo, Bulgaria. EU-sponsored talks collapsed Thursday between Russia and Ukraine on resolving a gas dispute that has cut supplies to Europe in the midst of a bitterly cold winter, with Moscow blamed for the failure.(AFP/Boryana Katsarova)AFP - EU-sponsored talks collapsed Thursday between Russia and Ukraine on resolving a gas dispute that has cut supplies to Europe in the midst of a bitterly cold winter, with Moscow blamed for the failure.




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