
"Your face is my map to your life." - Houdini, magician
We are all literally and unwittingly two-faced. To learn more about how you present yourself to the world, and your underlying, more "private" feelings, you just have to look yourself in the face. What to get out a mirror now, before you read further? Do you attract or alienate your insurance prospects and longtime staff?
You constantly present two aspects of yourself, on the two sides of your face. Recent research on the different functions of the left and right sides of the brain helps to explain why this is so. The two, vertical halves of the face are each affected by the nerves of the opposite side of the brain and show the world different parts of how you feel.
In fact, the two sides of your face, like the two sides of your body -- -the left and the right -- are usually asymmetrical and unequal in proportion. Look at yourself in the mirror -- full-face and full length -- to see the differences.
In short, your face is your shorthand to your body language.
Your expressions, in repose, are icons of your attitudes toward life.
The left side is your more "private" part of your personality and your right is the more "public" side of your face. The left often looks less happy than the right. Most subjects who have been analyzed projected their wish images upon their left side of their face and their right side related more to their real or basic self-image and attitude towards the world.
Your face's right side often appears more pleasant, sensitive, vulnerable and/or open in expression. The left side is less expressive than the right and tends to reflect the hidden, severe, stern and/or depressed aspects you usually intend to keep private from the world -- and sometimes even from yourself.
The left side is more likely to register negative emotions, while the right side tends to reflect the more positive and optimistic, but not necessarily phony part of your personality.
"When I smile I must also show the grimace behind it."
- Live Ullman, actress, author
Since the right side of the brain has more control over the left side of the body -- including the face -- then it stands to reason that the research on how the brain is organized, left and right, can give us insights into how we literally face the world and how we can better understand others. The left brain -- reflected more in the right side of the face -- relates to logic, pragmatic thinking, practicality and language.
The right part of the brain, in turn, relates more to intuition, imagination, and other more creative leanings.
The basic gut feelings, including your attitude towards yourself and your life emanate from your right brain. You express them more in the left side of your face.
We do not see things as they are; we see them as we are.
The more controlled or conscious responses -- the social mask you put on for the world -- may be processed more by the pragmatic left brain and appear more readily on the right side of the face.
Now you may be getting lost in "lefts" and "rights" of all this, but let's continue with some experiments you can conduct to learn more about yourself and others for whom you have strong feelings (like or dislike) in your life.
How Do You See the World?
Ironically, the right brain is more actively involved in observing the world -- which it does predominantly through your left eye. And, when you face someone, your left eye is across from the other person's right side. Therefore, you are more aware of their right side. But you are thus most noticing the side of the other person's face which is more connected with the left or "logical" and less revealing side. You miss facing the part of their face that is most likely to show underlying "true" feelings.
"Public / Private Face" Exercise
Here is a rather intimate exercise to do with someone -- and it doesn't involve disrobing or even touching. Sit facing each other. Now look at the left and the right sides of the other person's face. Does the right side show a more open, less tense presence? Does the left look more reserved, serious? The left side, that is their left side, is the more private face, remember, and the right side is their more public face. In fact, the left side is likely to show their more basic disposition. As you face each other, discuss your observations, one side at a time.
"The face is the most memorable part of the body and the eyes are the most memorable part of the face."
- Werner Wolff, psychiatrist and hypnotist
"Driver's License Photo Show" Exercise
Now try this experiment. Get out your driver's license. Look at both sides of your face, covering one side at a time with a piece of paper. Look "inward" at yourself and see if you observe different aspects of yourself.
You may also want to look back at your family album and look at the progression of your face and your personality development overtime -- and that of others in your family. Look at the childhood albums of close friends and in-laws for other perspectives on them.
"Photo Finish" Exercise
To gain a still more revealing view of yourself, find two photographic negatives of "head and shoulders", close-up pictures of yourself. If you don't have any handy, ask someone to take two pictures of you; offer to do the same for them and compare notes on this exercise.
Cut both negatives of yourself vertically in half, down the center of your face. Flop over one side of each negative.
Take a glossy-coated side and a dull-coated side of the left side of your face from the two negatives, and ask your camera shop to print it to create a "left-left" photo. Take a glossy and a dull-sided half of your face and also get a "right-right" print made.
Thus, instead of the normal right-left photo of your actual face, the joined half negatives become right-right and left-left faces. You will then see exaggerated versions of both aspects of yourself -- and will probably be able to see each more clearly.
Kare Anderson is the author of LikeABILITY (see Grand Store on her site), Make Yourself Memorable and SmartPartnering. A popular speaker on SmartPartnering and on how to be more frequently-quoted to become your kind of customers' top-of-mind choice, she also publishs the SayitBetter newsletter, with 32,000 subscribers in 28 countries.
AP - President-elect Barack Obama said Wednesday that reforming massive government entitlement programs such as Social Security and Medicare would be "a central part" of his effort to control federal spending. Obama made the pledge but provided few details as he named Nancy Killefer as his administration's chief performance officer, creating a new White House position aimed at eliminating government waste and improving efficiency.
AP - Israeli airstrikes and Hamas rockets resumed after a brief pause Wednesday to allow food and fuel to reach Palestinian civilians in Gaza, where an Israeli warplane dropped leaflets urging some residents to flee because of imminent attacks.
AP - Roland Burris said Wednesday he should be able to join the Senate "very shortly," after talking to newly supportive Democratic leaders and working on lingering legal obstacles. Talking to reporters on the second day of a Washington power odyssey that would intimidate many, the 71-year-old Burris declared himself happy and said he was pleased with his meeting with Sens. Harry Reid and Dick Durbin.
AP - Confronting a grim economy and a Middle East on fire, Barack Obama turned Wednesday to perhaps the only people on the planet who understand what he's in for: the four living members of the U.S. presidents' club.
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AP - Ottawa Senators forward Jarkko Ruutu was suspended by the NHL on Wednesday for two games without pay for biting Buffalo Sabres enforcer Andrew Peters. The NHL said Ruutu will lose $37,707 in pay and miss Ottawa's game at Boston on Thursday and a home game against the New York Rangers on Saturday.
Reuters - The U.S. budget deficit will swell to a record $1.186 trillion in fiscal 2009, congressional forecasters said on Wednesday, the result of an economic recession that has cut tax receipts and caused massive government bailouts of banks and automakers.
Reuters - Israeli aircraft and tanks pounded the Gaza Strip on Wednesday and troops battled Palestinian guerrillas on the ground as U.S. backing for a proposed truce raised expectations of an end to the 12-day-old offensive.
Reuters - United Auto Workers bargaining teams are arriving this week in Detroit as the union gears up for negotiations with General Motors Corp and Chrysler LLC, which are mandated to cut labor costs under a $17.4 billion federal bailout.
Reuters - In an abrupt switch, Democratic leaders began talks on Wednesday to swear in Roland Burris, appointed by embattled Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich to replace President-elect Barack Obama in the U.S. Senate.
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Reuters - Defense Secretary Robert Gates has told Congress that a planned buildup of U.S. forces in Afghanistan could add $5.5 billion to U.S. war costs in the current federal fiscal year, officials said on Wednesday.
Reuters - One of the packages accused swindler Bernard Madoff sent in violation of a court order contained about 13 watches, a diamond necklace and other valuables worth more than $1 million, prosecutors said in court papers released on Wednesday.
AFP - Israel on Wednesday approved an even tougher war on Hamas, warning residents to flee southern Gaza ahead of planned bombardments of cross-border tunnels, as the Palestinian death toll passed 700.
AFP - Russian President Dmitry Medvedev on Wednesday laid down terms for a resumption of Russian gas shipments via Ukraine to Europe as tens of thousands of Europeans suffered heating cuts amid freezing weather.
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