Let me preface this by saying right up front - this is NOT for everyone. The key is that my situation was friendly enough to still communicate with each other after we split. My ex-wife and I agreed that our kids were certainly worth that! And we still have to deal with one another until they are through college. This is offered as a life experience only and not intended as legal advice. As such, this may not apply to you.
After 25 years of marriage, I decided that I did not want to be married to my wife. We had drifted apart and in the last few years, things were getting worse. We had little in common anymore... including friends. By and large, mine were different from hers. She would go away on her weekends and I would go on mine. Other than our children, whom we both love very much, we were just a couple living together. She is still a good woman, just not one I wanted to be married to. There had to be something else... Sound familiar?
As our situation unfolded, she retained an attorney early on and we began negotiations in earnest within a month of separation. Sure we had our differences! But with an open line of communication available, we (her attorney and I) talked out our problems and came to an agreement within a few months.
I felt confident in representing myself after performing a few hours of research on the internet. And you bet, I was prepared to bail out and get an attorney too. But having done the research, nothing that came up was a surprise at all. I was very pleasantly surprised and amazed. I found that many things were already prescribed by statute as being pretty cut and dried. Child support? Maintenance? In NY, where I live, it was a matter of using past incomes to arrive at an appropriate level. The method and level were already set.
When it seemed to be all sorted out, I went to an attorney that a friend recommended highly. He had an offer of the first consultation costing only $50. for a one half hour conference. All I did was take the agreement to him for review. At the consultations conclusion, his exact words were "It seems that you have a pretty good handle on this. If you can get this signed and executed, you don't need me. Just call me if anything changes." Frankly I was overwhelmed! I had just saved $3,000. minimum! Money that could be used to put MY kids through college, not his!
I don't really know how unique my situation was. Hence, I do credit some luck on my part, as I said in the article summary. But it wasn't difficult.
I have performed a few legal services for myself in the past such as setting up a corporation, partnership, and purchase agreements. I believe that a person of reasonable intelligence can save an incredible amount of money on legal services, if they will do the research and use the preprinted legal forms that so many attorneys use themselves. It helps if you have gone through similar situations in the past. But had I ever had a divorce? Heck no! I had been married for over 25 years.
But here's the catch, I don't have a degree in law either! I urge you to not take this as a slam on attorneys. They have an excellent purpose in society, in spite of the jokes. I had the comfort level that allowed me to proceed beyond what I had anticipated I could. It won't work for everyone. Certainly, not everyone has that comfort level. It worked for me.
As a result of his life experiences, the author, George R Devendorf, was able to save several thousand dollars in legal fees. As a result, Mr. Devendorf has created a website to help others that feel able to represent themselves in certain legal matters. http://www.GotLegalHelp.com offers downloadable legal forms that are the same forms used by attorneys themselves! Whether your issue is Divorce, Incorporation, Last Will & Testament, Prenuptial Agreement, or Bankruptcy, GLH forms are available for most states.
AP - A litany of bad economic news has snuffed out Wall Street's five-day rally, sending stocks falling sharply as investors realized anew how troubled the U.S. economy really is. Confirmation that the nation is in a recession followed reports of only a modest gain in holiday shopping sales, and that prompted investors to begin unloading stocks. Downbeat data on manufacturing and construction spending added to the market's gloom.
AP - President-elect Barack Obama picked a national security team headed by former campaign rival Hillary Rodham Clinton and Bush administration holdover Robert Gates on Monday, and said he wants to consult with military commanders before settling on a firm timetable to withdraw U.S. combat troops from Iraq.
AP - The U.S. economy has been in a recession since December 2007, the National Bureau of Economic Research said Monday.
AP - India demanded Monday that Pakistan take "strong action" against those behind the deadly Mumbai attacks, and Washington pressured Islamabad to cooperate with the investigation.
AP - Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin urged Georgia voters to back Sen. Saxby Chambliss in Tuesday's runoff in an election eve appeal that underscored her popularity within the Republican Party and the GOP's efforts to stave off erosion of its shrinking Senate numbers.
AP - Happily contemplating another woman as the top U.S. diplomat, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice said Monday she will offer advice, privately, and then get out of the way.
AP - Ivana Trump has issued a statement confirming reports of marital discord with Italian entrepreneur Rossano Rubicondi. Trump, who married Rubicondi in April, says she filed a legal separation agreement three months ago. Trump says she kept quiet about it because she didn't want to ruin Rubicondi's chances as a contestant on the Italian edition of the reality TV show "Survivor."
AP - Plaxico Burress was led out of a police precinct in handcuffs Monday after surrendering on a weapons possession charge, and authorities said that teammate Antonio Pierce is being investigated over his role in an accidental shooting at a Manhattan nightclub.
Reuters - U.S. President-elect Barack Obama named former rival Hillary Clinton as secretary of state on Monday and said Robert Gates would remain defense secretary in a national security team charged with recasting America's leadership role in the world.
Reuters - Stocks tumbled on Monday as news pointing to the deepening economic slump around the world erased the bulk of last week's sharp gains, with financial services companies and retailers among Wall Street's biggest casualties.
Reuters - India demanded Pakistan take decisive action over deadly attacks in Mumbai it said were carried out by militants from its nuclear-armed rival, while the West urged cooperation to ease tension.
Reuters - President George W. Bush said the biggest regret of his presidency was flawed intelligence that Iraq had weapons of mass destruction and told ABC "World News" in an interview airing on Monday that he was unprepared for war when he took office.
Reuters - The U.S. economy has slumped into a recession, the nation's business cycle arbiter declared on Monday, while European leaders clashed over how much public money to spend tackling a deepening downturn.
Reuters - U.S. House of Representatives Speaker Nancy Pelosi met leading governors on Monday to discuss the size and shape of an economic stimulus package that one Democratic aide said was likely to cost around $500 billion.
Reuters - Thai protesters prepared to end their three-month occupation of the Prime Minister's office on Monday to consolidate their grip on the main airport ahead of a court verdict that could dissolve the elected government.
Reuters - Federal authorities arrested the mayor of Birmingham, Alabama, on Monday in a corruption probe surrounding a massive sewer bond debt that has forced Jefferson County to the brink of bankruptcy.
AFP - Barack Obama on Monday nominated Hillary Clinton to be his "tough," "smart" secretary of state and his former foe vowed to give her all to steer America through a perfect storm of global crises.
AFP - India on Monday formally accused "elements" in Pakistan of being behind the devastating Islamic militant attacks in Mumbai and demanded that Islamabad take "strong action".
The best predictor of a good divorce outcome is the degree of... Read More
It's a well known fact that in this day and age most... Read More
Being in a loveless marriage is a frustrating predicament, but it may... Read More
The most recent statistics show that about 50% of all marriages end... Read More
Deciding about whether you should get a divorce or not is an... Read More
No one besides you can determine whether or not a divorce is... Read More
Everyone has heard the story (from friends, co-workers, and family members) of... Read More
When making a divorce decision, there are quite a few things that... Read More
What 3 major divorce parenting mistakes that surely lead to unhappy, unhealthy... Read More
When a nuclear family separates, it usually separates into a "custodial" family... Read More
A common reason why men wont commit could be due to their... Read More
Let me preface this by saying right up front - this is... Read More
Dating is tough for just about everybody, but it's even tougher for... Read More
Husbands cheat on their wives for many reasons. They could be bored... Read More
Here are some useful tips on joint bank accounts and divorce. If... Read More
While divorce can be an emotionally draining experience, even in the best... Read More
My oldest boy asked me something the other day about all the... Read More
Life after divorce is something that most people who are going through... Read More
Women who believe a divorce is a possibility or who think that... Read More
The EmotionsDivorce is a scary, lonely and misunderstood process for most people,... Read More
Of course you want to get your Judgment--that's the goal of your... Read More
Mary and Bill recently divorced. Their divorce decree stated that Bill would... Read More
Divorce is something no one hopes will happen to them when they... Read More
Collaborative law is based on the realization that the commitment by the... Read More
As a licensed mental health professional, I work with many individuals, couples,... Read More
Finance in marriage seperation is a very big issue particularly with regards... Read More
Marriage is a very solemn and serious chapter on any person's life.... Read More
All children are different and respond differently to divorce. Depending on the... Read More
If you are reading this, then you are probably either thinking of... Read More
It is always the children that suffer the most when a marriage... Read More
No matter which side you are on, spousal support is something that... Read More
The legal divorce vs. your real divorce The legal divorce has... Read More
When a couple decides their marriage is over, a tremendous sense of... Read More
There are many steps to take to protect yourself in a divorce.... Read More
An uncontested divorce is the most common type of divorce. An uncontested... Read More
Having to deal with an extramarital affair can be a life-changing event,... Read More
Non-lawyers are often surprised to learn that a spouse can sue for... Read More
Attempts to use the worldwide Web as an effective means of struggle... Read More
There are many types of divorce articles available on the Internet by... Read More
What 7 most distressful situations to kids that divorced parents should avoid?... Read More
It is fitting that I should write this story on Valentines Day,... Read More
So, you've decided that you're no longer "a couple", but for whatever... Read More
Divorce or the end of a long-term relationship is a particularly difficult... Read More
I thought I would never feel the light of life again when... Read More
We have all most probably encountered it at some stage in our... Read More
One out of every two marriages in America is failing.American families are... Read More
What is the Get?The Get is the Jewish form of divorce. The... Read More
There are many types of divorce articles available on the Internet by... Read More
Deciding about whether you should get a divorce or not is an... Read More
Ignorance is the most common trap in the business of divorce, so... Read More
When you're faced with the possibility of divorce it's important that you... Read More
Here are some useful tips on joint bank accounts and divorce. If... Read More
Divorce has become part of life in the 21st century. The stigma... Read More
It is fitting that I should write this story on Valentines Day,... Read More
The pain of finding out that your partner is cheating on you... Read More
1. DO allow yourself enough time to make one of your biggest... Read More
You're going to want to be working on your divorce agreement outside... Read More
Being marriage means being fully committed to your husband as to the... Read More
The best predictor of a good divorce outcome is the degree of... Read More
A common reason why men wont commit could be due to their... Read More
If you are reading this, then you are probably either thinking of... Read More
When do you need to hire a family law attorney and when... Read More
This article and my articles "Overcoming Obstacles to Agreement" and "Negotiating Agreement"... Read More
For the over 50% of marriages that end in divorce, Christmas can... Read More
There is no magic solution to getting issues surrounding child support resolved.... Read More
What is the Get?The Get is the Jewish form of divorce. The... Read More
The legal divorce vs. your real divorce The legal divorce has... Read More
Is your spouse violent, abusive, harassing? In cases of harassment or violence... Read More
An uncontested divorce is the most common type of divorce. An uncontested... Read More
Stay MarriedAlong with any tough decision comes reluctance, especially when that decision... Read More
Life after divorce is something that most people who are going through... Read More
When we were children we believed in fairy tales and happy ever... Read More
Raleigh, NC-The largest divorce firm in the state, Rosen Law Firm, says... Read More
Going through a divorce is a very challenging time in a person's... Read More
The most recent statistics show that about 50% of all marriages end... Read More
Collaborative law is based on the realization that the commitment by the... Read More
We have all most probably encountered it at some stage in our... Read More
When making a divorce decision, there are quite a few things that... Read More
Mary and Bill recently divorced. Their divorce decree stated that Bill would... Read More
Let me preface this by saying right up front - this is... Read More
What 3 major divorce parenting mistakes that surely lead to unhappy, unhealthy... Read More
When a nuclear family separates, it usually separates into a "custodial" family... Read More
Women who believe a divorce is a possibility or who think that... Read More
Seven Tips to help you keep more of your money at a... Read More
Divorce is something no one hopes will happen to them when they... Read More
In a recent article entitled "Some Evidence On How We Are Spiritually... Read More
There are many advantages to doing your own divorce. Three significant ones... Read More
No matter which side you are on, spousal support is something that... Read More
Getting the right type of divorce advice depends on what type of... Read More
During a wedding ceremony, when people are joined together in matrimony, they... Read More
Surviving divorce can be a valid fear if you're contemplating getting a... Read More
Divorce or the end of a long-term relationship is a particularly difficult... Read More
All children are different and respond differently to divorce. Depending on the... Read More
My oldest boy asked me something the other day about all the... Read More
Divorce Divorce |