It Wont Happen Again

Have you or do you know someone who has been abused or been involved in an abusive relationship? What is your definition of abuse? All of us know that physical violence is abuse. We also know there is emotional and mental abuse too, but do we know what it really is?

What counts as abuse?

I, myself have experienced physical, emotional, and mental abuse to different degrees. My family members and friends have suffered abuse from spouses and significant others, and in some cases even family members.

If you slap someone, that is abuse, and we know that. If you tell someone to shut up, is that abuse? Is it the tone of your voice or the conviction in which you say it, do those things make it abuse? Name calling is definitely a form of abuse.

Abuse breaks a person down bit by bit. Sometimes you don't make it back. Your self -esteem is gone, you become out of control yourselves, sometimes the victim becomes the abuser.

Abuse will affect the way you look at yourselves and others. I have been slapped, punched and kicked, my nose has been broken, I have lost a baby because of abuse, and that is just the physical form.

I have been in knock -down drag -out fights with men because I didn't agree with the way I was being treated and talked to. Because I wouldn't accept the bull that people throw at me. I have been called names, such as bitch and whore, because I didn't agree with a man, my opinion differed or because I was acting up, and because I made them jealous.

I got hit by a man (if you want to call him that) for the first time when I was 17 yrs old. You know what that did? It made me a fighter. I wouldn't back down, and I'll tell you I have had my ass kicked a few times, but I have also kicked some myself. Because NO man will ever lay a hand on me again and Noone is ever going to disrespect me and take away my spirit. They have tried, I am independent and I don't need a man that bad.

I would rather live the rest of my life alone, then with someone who disrespects me and hurts me. There is always hope, there is always a way out. Someone will listen, someone will help. Noone on this earth needs to be treated badly. We were not put here for other people to knock us around. We are all special people in God's eyes. We need to take care of each other, protect each other, do right by each other.

I have not been in an abusive relationship for years, I NEVER will be again. I am not afraid to face life alone, there is no need in anyone being that afraid. God Bless, and take care of each other, find happiness, everyone deserves that.

Vaughn Pascal

For God and Country

To God and Jesus; Thank you. To Bub and Doc; I love you.

In The News:

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Illinois U.S. Senate Appointee Roland Burris, left, meets with Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid of Nev., Wednesday, Jan. 7, 2009, on Capitol Hill in Washington. (AP Photo/Susan Walsh)AP - Senate Democrats beat a hasty retreat Wednesday from their rejection of Roland Burris as President-elect Barack Obama's successor, yielding to pressure from Obama himself and from senators irked that the standoff was draining attention and putting them in a bad light. Burris said with a smile he expected to join them "very shortly."



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President-elect Barack Obama is welcomed by President George W. Bush for a meeting at the White House in Washington, Wednesday, Jan. 7, 2009, with former presidents, from left, George H.W. Bush, Bill  Clinton, and Jimmy Carter.  (AP Photo/J. Scott Applewhite)AP - Confronting a grim economy and a Middle East on fire, Barack Obama turned Wednesday to perhaps the only people on the planet who understand what he's in for: the four living members of the U.S. presidents' club.



Rescue workers evacuate residents from a flooded neighborhood along  McCutcheon Rd. near Orting, Wash. Wednesday, Jan. 7, 2009. The rapidly rising Puyallup River forced hundreds of people in the area from their homes. (AP Photo/Ted S. Warren)AP - Rain and high winds lashed Washington state Wednesday, causing widespread avalanches, mudslides, flooding and road closures as the heavy snowfall that has buried parts of the state began to rapidly melt.



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AP - An eastern Pennsylvania man may face up to 37 years in prison for tearing open a neighbor's door with a chain saw. Police say 34-year-old Robert Kane began sawing through the front door of Jamie Zaleski's apartment in Scranton while Zaleski and several friends ran out the back.

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Israeli soldiers mourn during the funeral of their comrade Alex Mashavisky at a cemetery in Beer Sheva January 7, 2009. (Eric Gaillard/Reuters)Reuters - Israeli aircraft and tanks pounded the Gaza Strip on Wednesday and troops battled Palestinian guerrillas on the ground as U.S. backing for a proposed truce raised expectations of an end to the 12-day-old offensive.



President Bush greets President-elect Barack Obama at the White House, November 10, 2008. (Joshua Roberts/Reuters)Reuters - The U.S. budget deficit will swell to a record $1.186 trillion in fiscal 2009, congressional forecasters said on Wednesday, the result of an economic recession that has cut tax receipts and caused massive government bailouts of banks and automakers.



Senate-designate Roland Burris talks with Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid in Reid's office on Capitol Hill, January 7, 2009. (Larry Downing/Reuters)Reuters - In an abrupt switch, Democratic leaders began talks on Wednesday to swear in Roland Burris, appointed by embattled Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich to replace President-elect Barack Obama in the U.S. Senate.



United Auto Workers (UAW) President Ron Gettelfinger (C) addresses the media as UAW Vice-Presidents listen at the UAW Solidarity House in Detroit, Michigan December 12, 2008. (Rebecca Cook/Reuters)Reuters - United Auto Workers bargaining teams are arriving this week in Detroit as the union gears up for negotiations with General Motors Corp and Chrysler LLC, which are mandated to cut labor costs under a $17.4 billion federal bailout.



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Ali al-Marri, who has been held for 5-1/2 years at a U.S. military prison in South Carolina, is seen in this undated photograph released to Reuters on January 6, 2008. An early test for President-elect Barack Obama will be the case of suspected al Qaeda 'sleeper' agent Marri, which will force Obama to take a position on his predecessor's claim that anyone the president deems a national security threat can be imprisoned indefinitely without charges in the United States. (Handout/Reuters)Reuters - The case of Ali al-Marri, accused of being an al Qaeda "sleeper" agent and held for 5-1/2 years at a U.S. military prison in South Carolina, will be an early test for President-elect Barack Obama.



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Bernard Madoff is escorted in a vehicle from Federal Court in New York, January 5, 2009. (Lucas Jackson/Reuters)Reuters - Accused swindler Bernard Madoff should be jailed for violating a court order by mailing $1 million worth of diamonds, watches and other jewelry to friends and family, U.S. prosecutors told a court on Wednesday.



Smoke billows following an Israel air strike in Rafah near the Gaza Strip's border with Egypt. Israel on Wednesday approved an even tougher war on Hamas, warning residents to flee southern Gaza ahead of planned bombing of cross-border tunnels, as the Palestinian death toll passed 700.(AFP/Said Khatib)AFP - Israel on Wednesday approved an even tougher war on Hamas, warning residents to flee southern Gaza ahead of planned bombing of cross-border tunnels, as the Palestinian death toll passed 700.



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