Life Inspiration: 12 Tips for Successful Living

1. Constant affirmation without accountability is a sure-fire way to cripple a child. In other words, belief in yourself without responsibility leads to a sense of entitlement.

2. Raise your hand if you've ever been rejected for anything, anytime, anywhere. We all have. How would you like to have a nice little four-letter word for the next time you're rejected? It's: NEXT. Next sale, next job, next date, next whatever.

3. Beware of people who use their own emotional pain as a tool to manipulate others instead of as a motivation to change themselves.

4. Parents of teens need to watch out for NMK Syndrome: Not My Kid, as in "my kid couldn't have done ___" (fill in the blank). Well, yes, they could have. Even if you have faithfully raised them not to do certain things, kids still have the power of choice, which means they can make bad choices.

NMK Syndrome can blind you to something that needs immediate attention. Trust in your kids and in your parenting, and always check out what you hear.

5. When you receive a notice in your credit card statement that says, "Congratulations, because of your excellent payment history, there is no minimum fee due this month," it's not a time for celebration. You're still being charged interest. These people are not your friends.

6. It's a humbling and sobering experience to have a child who wants to be like you.

7. I've noticed more and more people doing what I call "caboose living."

Picture a three-car train. The engine in front we'll call facts/reality; the car in the middle is our thoughts, beliefs, decisions, choices and behaviors based on the facts; the caboose is our feelings. The facts/reality come first, then thoughts and behaviors followed by feelings.

Many folks try to run their life train with the caboose (feelings) in the lead. Feelings are interesting and important, but they cannot drive the train. Pay attention to your feelings, but let the facts/reality drive the train.

8. A successful marriage requires selective and strategic ignoring. The right things to ignore are little habits and irritating peculiarities that we all have. The problem comes when you select the wrong things to ignore.

9. I wonder if it's a bad thing to believe that football on TV is one of the first signs of fall approaching.

10. Most folks live with the illusion that worrying about something can actually make a difference. The only possible way that worrying can make a difference is if the worrying motivates you to take action to do something about the subject of your worry.

11.People often say, "Well, I'm just going with the flow." The problem with going with the flow is that many times the flow is lost and does not know where it is going.

12. Best quote I've seen since last time, by Miami Herald columnist Leonard Pitts: "At some point, though, a problem ought to be defined less by our ability to explain why it happens than by our willingness to demand that it happen no more."

Visit SecretsofGreatRelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.

In The News:

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Palestinians pray over the bodies of  people killed near a United Nations school Tuesday, during their funeral in the Jebaliya refugee camp, in the northern Gaza Strip, Wednesday, Jan. 7, 2009. Israel's military paused its Gaza offensive for three hours Wednesday to allow food and fuel to reach besieged Palestinians, and the country's leaders debated whether to accept an international cease-fire plan or expand the assault against Hamas. With criticism rising of the operation's spiraling civilian death toll and Gazans increasingly suffering the effects of nonstop airstrikes and shelling, Israel's military said it opened 'humanitarian corridors' to allow aid supplies to reach Palestinians.(AP Photo/Hatem Moussa)AP - Israel resumed its Gaza offensive Wednesday, bombing heavily around suspected smuggling tunnels near the border with Egypt after a three-hour lull to allow in humanitarian aid. Hamas responded with a rocket barrage.



People looks for jobs in front of computer screens at the California Employment Development Department in Sunnyvale, Calif., Tuesday, Jan. 6, 2009. The country lost nearly 2 million jobs through November and more bad news is expected this week when the government releases data on weekly jobless claims and December unemployment. No matter how bad those numbers are, and economists expect at least another 500,000 jobs were lost last month, the pain is stretching into 2009. (AP Photo/Marcio Jose Sanchez)AP - Pink slips are piling higher as companies scramble to cut costs even deeper to survive the country's economic and financial storms.



President-elect Barack Obama gestures during a news conference at his transition office in Washington, Wednesday, Jan. 7, 2009, where he introduced Nancy Killefer, right, to the newly created position of chief performance officer. (AP Photo/Lawrence Jackson)AP - Pointing with concern to "red ink as far as the eye can see," President-elect Barack Obama pledged Wednesday to tackle out-of-control Social Security and Medicare spending and named a special watchdog to clamp down on other federal programs — even as he campaigned anew to spend the largest pile of taxpayer money in history to revive the sinking economy.



Illinois U.S. Senate Appointee Roland Burris, left, meets with Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid of Nev., Wednesday, Jan. 7, 2009, on Capitol Hill in Washington. (AP Photo/Susan Walsh)AP - Senate Democrats beat a hasty retreat Wednesday from their rejection of Roland Burris as President-elect Barack Obama's successor, yielding to pressure from Obama himself and from senators irked that the standoff was draining attention and putting them in a bad light. Burris said with a smile he expected to join them "very shortly."



Protesters yell during a demonstration against the shooting death of Oscar Grant at the Fruitvale BART station in Oakland, Calif., Wednesday, Jan. 7, 2009. Grant was shot and killed by a police officer after an altercation on a BART train station platform in Oakland on New Year's Day.  (AP Photo/Marcio Jose Sanchez)AP - Protests over the fatal shooting of an unarmed man by a Bay Area Rapid Transit police officer turned violent Wednesday night, with windows broken, streets shut down and train stations closed.



President-elect Barack Obama is welcomed by President George W. Bush for a meeting at the White House in Washington, Wednesday, Jan. 7, 2009, with former presidents, from left, George H.W. Bush, Bill  Clinton, and Jimmy Carter.  (AP Photo/J. Scott Applewhite)AP - Confronting a grim economy and a Middle East on fire, Barack Obama turned Wednesday to perhaps the only people on the planet who understand what he's in for: the four living members of the U.S. presidents' club.



In this photo provided by the Washington State Department of Transportation, water rushes past a washed out road near Blewett Pass on U.S. highway 97 in Washington State on Wednesday, Jan. 7, 2009 in Washington State. (AP Photo/Washington State Department of Transportation)AP - Rain and high winds lashed Washington state Wednesday, causing widespread avalanches, mudslides, flooding and road closures as the heavy snowfall that has buried parts of the state began to rapidly melt.



Workers put bulletproof glass on President-elect Barack Obama's Inaugural Reviewing Stand on Pennsylvania Avenue in front of the White House in Washington, Monday, Jan. 5, 2009. (AP Photo/Ron Edmonds)AP - The upcoming inauguration of Barack Obama is an attractive target for international and domestic terrorists, but U.S. intelligence officials have no information about specific threats to the Jan. 20 event.



Christian Bale accepts the favorite action movie award for 'The Dark Knight' at the 35th Annual People's Choice Awards on Wednesday Jan. 7, 2009 in Los Angeles. (AP Photo/Matt Sayles)AP - Holy People's Choice Awards, Batman!



Harvard's Jeremy Lin (4) drives for the basket in front of Boston College's Rakim Sanders in the first half of an NCAA college basketball game Wednesday, Jan. 7, 2009, in Boston. (AP Photo/Michael Dwyer)AP - Jeremy Lin scored 27 points to lead Harvard to an 82-70 upset over No. 17 Boston College on Wednesday night, three days after the Eagles upset previously top-ranked North Carolina.



An Israeli soldier stands next to blindfolded Palestinian prisoners after they were arrested during an Israeli military operation in the northern Gaza Strip January 7, 2009, in this picture released by the Israeli Defence Forces (IDF). U.S. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice said on Wednesday she had pressed Israel to seriously consider an Egyptian ceasefire plan as the U.N. Security Council weighed action to end Israel's attack on Gaza. (IDF/Handout/Reuters)Reuters - Israeli warplanes bombed targets across the Gaza Strip on Thursday and tanks advanced on Palestinian guerrillas as U.S. backing for a truce proposal raised expectations of an end to the offensive.



Reuters - Three rockets fired from Lebanon exploded in northern Israel on Thursday, the first since the Jewish state launched an offensive in Gaza two weeks ago, Israeli police said.

A share trader reacts while checking share prices in front of the German share price index DAX board at the German stock exchange in Frankfurt, December 18, 2008. (Kai Pfaffenbach/Reuters)Reuters - A fresh wave of profit warnings and job cuts soured investor sentiment on Thursday after an employment report suggested U.S. job losses in December could be the worst in almost 60 years.



Senate-designate Roland Burris talks with Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid in Reid's office on Capitol Hill, January 7, 2009. (Larry Downing/Reuters)Reuters - In an abrupt switch, Democratic leaders began talks on Wednesday to swear in Roland Burris, appointed by embattled Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich to replace President-elect Barack Obama in the U.S. Senate.



President Bush greets President-elect Barack Obama at the White House, November 10, 2008. (Joshua Roberts/Reuters)Reuters - The U.S. budget deficit will swell to a record $1.186 trillion in fiscal 2009, congressional forecasters said on Wednesday, the result of an economic recession that has cut tax receipts and caused massive government bailouts of banks and automakers.



Reuters - U.S. cities are vulnerable to an attack like the gun-and-grenade assault that terrorized Mumbai for three days and killed 179 people, the White House homeland security adviser said on Wednesday.

Ali al-Marri, who has been held for 5-1/2 years at a U.S. military prison in South Carolina, is seen in this undated photograph released to Reuters on January 6, 2008. An early test for President-elect Barack Obama will be the case of suspected al Qaeda 'sleeper' agent Marri, which will force Obama to take a position on his predecessor's claim that anyone the president deems a national security threat can be imprisoned indefinitely without charges in the United States. (Handout/Reuters)Reuters - The case of Ali al-Marri, accused of being an al Qaeda "sleeper" agent and held for 5-1/2 years at a U.S. military prison in South Carolina, will be an early test for President-elect Barack Obama.



Eggs are stacked up at an egg farm in San Diego County, July 29, 2008. (Mike Blake/Reuters)Reuters - An outbreak of salmonella food poisoning has made 388 people sick across 42 states, sending 18 percent of them to the hospital, U.S. health officials said on Wednesday.



Three to four rockets hit northern Israel from Lebanon early Thursday, military sources told AFP.(AFP)AFP - Three to four rockets hit northern Israel from Lebanon early Thursday, military sources told AFP.



A Palestinian protestor flashes the V for 'victory' sign in front of an Israeli soldier near Damascus Gate in Jerusalem's old city. Israeli warplanes bombed suspected arms-smuggling tunnels in southern Gaza early Thursday, as diplomats worked to secure a ceasefire in an offensive that has killed 700 Palestinians.(AFP/Ahmad Gharabli)AFP - Israeli warplanes bombed suspected arms-smuggling tunnels in southern Gaza early Thursday, as diplomats worked to secure a ceasefire in an offensive that has killed 700 Palestinians.




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