Wanna Trade Places?

Even immediately after my car accident, every single person who saw me was pleasantly shocked at how "great" I looked. Funny how much a little concealer and a new hair style can make anyone look fabulous.

One of my physicians confidently told me "there's no 'look' for pain". This wise woman also said "you can't see muscular or neurological damage".

Going through physical and neurological (inner ear disorder) therapy for months, I was in awe by anyone with broken bones. I constantly saw quicker recoveries for people with pins in their legs.

I also often wished for a pain in my butt, because I was sick of it being in my back, shoulder, knee, and head. And now, I found out that I may have joint problems too...yipee.

Anyways, I took my compliments pleasantly, and politely reminded them NOT to judge a book by its cover, even good ones.

Whenever I tried to wean into work, the effort to make myself presentable for a couple of hours with a crowded room filled with people was extremely difficult. Walking through noisy crowds gave me motion sickness. Unfortunately, the compliments often turned into "you look and sound GREAT" with a huff and a puff.

So, my constant rebuttal was "Wanna trade places?" with a smirk. They rarely asked for details, and assumed my life was just fine.

Yeah, writing my book "Empowering Women to Power Network" was fulfilling one of my dreams, but promoting it is a whole job in and of itself...something I'm not fully able to handle right now.

Hey, and you're also right: I'm living my other dream of homsechooling my girls too (thanks for remembering).

Just so you know even up to this very day, my husband and I find new ways to vertigo-safety our house so I don't faint or pass-out when I'm home alone with the girls. Our four-year old knows how to call 911, report our address, and use a cell phone...just in case.

Do I want sympathy? No way!

My point: I don't wanna trade places with anyone.

So, I stopped asking that question when I realized I was just fueling sarcasm with more sarcasm. No doubt, I've always been a very sarcastic person, but to joke around may be fine...to pass judgment is not.

I don't give a darn what people may think, because I have enough to worry about. Can you imagine not sitting too long in a chair because of back pain, or not standing too long because of your knee? Pretty annoying, huh?

But, I'm grateful for these conditions.

Consider some of these women who are within my own sphere of influence:

- Having clinical depression that she would cry all day and night, be insomniac, paranoid, and can not physically get out of bed for days at a time.

- Having a restraining order against her hope-to-be X-husband for herself and three children because he abused them. She lives in fear and worry for all their safety.

- Being 35 years old and experiencing a car accident that only broke her hips, and then the day she was supposed to come home she died. Survived by this tragedy are her husband and four children: the youngest is three and oldest 14 years old.

All of this happened during my recovery these past eight months.

Do I feel blessed? You betcha.

No matter what you may see or feel about another person, just think: "Would you wanna trade places with that person when you have NO idea what their situation really is right now!?"

My answer is "No Way", how 'bout you?

I didn't think so.

(c) 2005 Ponn M. Sabra, MPH

Ponn M. Sabra, MPH is the Author of "Empowering Women to Power Network". To learn more about her book and sign-up for FREE tips, articles and resources, visit her at http://www.empowerwomennow.com . Ponn is profiled in Marquis' Who's Who of America and Who's Who of American Women.

In The News:

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Senate Majority Harry Reid of Nev., center, accompanied by fellow Democratic leaders, gestures during a news conference on Capitol Hill in Washington, Thursday, Nov. 20, 2008, to discuss the auto industry bailout. From left are, House Majority Whip Steny Hoyer of Md.,  House Speaker Nancy Pelosi of Calif., Reid, Sen. Christopher Dodd, D-Conn.,  Sen. Richard Durbin, D-Ill., and  Sen. Patty Murray, D-Wash. (AP Photo/Gerald Herbert)AP - Democratic leaders ordered Detroit's Big Three automakers Friday to submit what amounts to a detailed loan application to Congress so lawmakers can decide whether to give the beleaguered industry an emergency $25 billion lifeline.



U.S. President George W. Bush and with President Hu Jintao of China, right, shake hands before their meeting at the APEC Summit in Lima, Peru, Friday, Nov. 21, 2008. (AP Photo/Lawrence Jackson)AP - In a last dash of diplomacy, President George W. Bush on Friday sought China's help in pinning down North Korea to keep its shaky promises of nuclear disarmament.



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Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke (R) nods as he listens to President of the Federal Reserve Bank of New York Timothy Geithner before addressing the Economic Club of New York in this October 15, 2008 file photo. (Lucas Jackson/Files/Reuters)Reuters - President-elect Barack Obama on Friday moved toward nominating Timothy Geithner as Treasury secretary and charging the respected head of the New York Federal Reserve with helping pull the United States out of an economic nosedive.



Pedestrians walk past a Citibank branch in Singapore November 18, 2008. (Vivek Prakash/Reuters)Reuters - Citigroup Inc has begun talks with the U.S. government as its plummeting share price raises doubts about the bank's ability to survive, a person familiar with the matter said.



Leaders of the U.S. automotive industry testify at a hearing held by the House Financial Services Committee on Capitol Hill in Washington November 19, 2008. From left are General Motors CEO Richard Wagoner, Chrysler Chairman and CEO Robert Nardelli and Ford president and CEO Alan Mulally. (Kevin Lamarque/Reuters)Reuters - Detroit automakers began work on turnaround plans demanded by Congress in return for $25 billion in aid as General Motors Corp said it would cut production more and give up two of its controversial corporate jets.



General Motors World Headquarters is seen along the Detroit River in Detroit, Michigan, September 17, 2008. (Rebecca Cook/Reuters)Reuters - The board of directors of embattled U.S. automaker General Motors Corp is considering "all options" including bankruptcy, according to a report on the Wall Street Journal's website late on Friday.



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