
A series of articles exploring the seven critical areas that can indicate a partnership is in trouble.
Conflict Becoming the Norm ? Part 1
Dr. Dean Ornish, noted cardiologist, says the greatest cause of disease is the stress that comes from conflict. Conflict is bad for your health, your personal life and definitely bad for your business.
When disagreements have reached the stage of conflict, emotions have overcome the issue. At this point no one is thinking clearly or speaking truthfully about the original problem. It becomes all about winning. How useful is that?
You can win the battle and lose a whole lot more. Conflict becomes a nail in the coffin of your marriage, or in your business partnership. Though you may win in court, you often lose in life. This is a major component of the scenario that accounts for the high rate of divorce in marriage and even higher rate of dissolution of business partnerships.
Even if conflict doesn't reach this dramatic result, living with conflict is an unhappy, unhealthy situation. Not only does it cause you misery, but it is contagious. Employees, clients and family members feel the tension. They may be taking sides even without realizing the unspoken details of the issue. You and your partner avoid meeting, may deteriorate into a yelling match when you do meet, or live in silence avoiding addressing other important issues as well. This is not the scenario that inspires you to get out of bed in the morning.
The best solution is prevention. Resolve things at the disagreement level before they become conflicts. If the two of you can't get to resolution where you both feel like winners, call in a coach. Actually, my clients find that a monthly meeting is a great preventative and also teaches them the tools needed to handle most situations on their own.
Now is the time to remember that there were good reasons you chose your partner. If you were honest and sincere in your initial evaluation and desire to succeed, it's helpful to keep that in mind and if things have gotten out of hand, hire an outside expert who can help you get back to that place of harmony and mutual respect.
The first step in resolving conflict is to agree to do so and to agree on the ultimate goal which is greater than each of you as individuals. When you are seriously committed to the same outcome things can usually work out. When you've reached this point, a third party, non-biased expert listener and coach is not just desirable, but essential to direct the discussion and keep emotions at bay.
About The Author
Dorene Lehavi, Ph.D. is principal of Next Level Business and Professional Coaching. She coaches Professionals and Business Partners and teaches teleclasses on techniques to break through barriers to the next level. Dr. Lehavi offers a complimentary coaching session so you can experience how coaching can work for you. Contact Dr. Lehavi at Dorene@CoachingforYourNextLevel.com or on the web at Http://www.CoachingforYourNextLevel.com. Subscribe to Mastering Your Next Level monthly e-newsletter at http://www.coachingforyournextlevel.com/newsletter.html
dorene@nextlevelpartnership.com
AP - Israeli jets and helicopters bombarded Gaza Friday and Hamas responded with a barrage of rockets, as Israel's government said it will press forward with its offensive despite a U.N. resolution calling for an immediate cease-fire.
AP - Gov. Rod Blagojevich faces almost certain impeachment by the Illinois House, a historic step that would trigger a trial to determine whether the Democratic governor should be tossed out of office.
AP - Lawmakers are under orders to finish action on President-elect Barack Obama's nearly $800 billion economic recovery plan by mid-February. But already it is plain that a set of serious fissures need to be bridged if the bill is to be completed within five weeks.
AP - Investors showed nervousness Friday ahead of the government's monthly employment report, sending stock futures moderately lower.
AP - Democrats are ushering in what they believe will be a new labor-friendly era in Washington with House votes on two bills aimed at helping women fight pay discrimination in the workplace.
AP - Millions of tons of toxic coal ash is piling up in power plant ponds in 32 states, a practice the federal government has long recognized as a risk to human health and the environment but has left unregulated.
AP - President-elect Barack Obama is completing his national security team by announcing his unusual choices for CIA director and a national intelligence director who may face tough Senate confirmation questioning over how he confronted the Indonesian military when civilian massacres were occurring in East Timor.
AP - Just minutes after George W. Bush took the oath of office eight years ago, he signed papers formally nominating 13 Cabinet-level officials. Several hours later, the Senate, meeting in a special Saturday session, confirmed seven Cabinet secretaries, including the heads of the key posts at State, Treasury and Defense.
AP - Tim Tebow enjoyed the battering-ram runs. He liked the old-school jump pass. Drawing a rare penalty, that really made Tebow's day. With No. 1 Florida about to finish off No. 2 Oklahoma 24-14 for the BCS championship Thursday night, Tebow was flagged for unsportsmanlike conduct.
Reuters - Steep falls in European industrial output underlined the severity of the world economic crisis on Friday and more grim news was on the way with the United States expected to report the biggest monthly job cuts in more than 30 years.
Reuters - Israel pushed ahead with its two-week-old offensive in the Gaza Strip on Friday, defying a U.N. Security Council resolution calling for an immediate ceasefire.
Reuters - Russia's state-controlled gas monopoly said a deal to monitor gas exports via Ukraine would be signed on Friday, allowing for the resumption of supplies to Europe cut off by Moscow's price row with Kiev.
Reuters - Financial giant Citigroup Inc will support a proposal in Congress to rewrite U.S. bankruptcy law to help troubled mortgage borrowers avoid foreclosure, Chief Executive Vikram Pandit said on Thursday.
Reuters - A legislative committee on Thursday recommended the impeachment of Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich, citing widespread abuse of power including allegations he tried to sell the U.S. Senate seat vacated by President-elect Barack Obama.
Reuters - President-elect Barack Obama's economic team is urgently overhauling the $700 billion financial rescue package to broaden its scope beyond Wall Street, The Washington Post reported on Friday.
Reuters - An analysis of proposals to overhaul U.S. health care by President-elect Barack Obama and members of Congress suggests it is possible to insure all Americans without significantly raising total health spending.
AFP - Israel and Hamas launched heavy air strikes and rocket attacks on each other Friday, ignoring a UN Security Council order on the warring rivals to end their conflict.
AFP - Russian gas deliveries to Europe could resume later Friday, the head of Russia's state gas firm said, raising hopes for an end to a transit dispute with Ukraine that has left several European states without gas at a moment of bitter cold.
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